NCR: National Corporate Radio News

In this episode, Borrin asks if trying Khalid Sheikh Mohammad, the so-called mastermind of 9/11, in a federal court is the appropriate venue or not. Joining him to say "hell no" is former New York mayor Rudy Giuliani, a man who can't stop saying "9/11". Borrin asks Rudy about the upcoming terror trial and a variety of other events ... and gets an exclusive scoop! Listen and find out The Big News. Special guest appearance from Michael Perrick, aka Crimebo the Clown! Check him out at www.crimebo.com This program was recorded on November 17, 2009 at the House of Honky Bean, sometime in the afternoon.

In this episode, Borrin follows the continuing saga of health care legislation as the front line wends its way to the Senate. Will a health care bill be "dead on arrival" there, or can a promised filibuster be broken and the seemingly unattainable goal of meaningful health care reform in the United States somehow be reached? Joining Borrin to contemplate these questions are two Senators and one nobody: Senator Joe "Joementum" Lieberman, Senator Lindsey "Girl's Name" Graham, and NCR Very Senior Commentator and Forgotten Pile of Old Skin, Daniel Snorr. This program was recorded at the House of Honky Bean on Tuesday, November 10, 2009 at 7:30 or so in the p.m. Next week: Something Else.

NCR is on the road this week, so in lieu of current events, we turn once again to the vault. In this archived episode from 2006, Borrin asks if cartoon depictions of the Prophet Muhammad are by their very nature offensive to Muslims. Joining him to ponder that question is a cartoon depiction of the Prophet Muhammad. This program was recorded live at killradio on February 7, 2006 at the usual hour. Next week: swine flu? Or health care? Can we have both? Yes we can.

In this episode, Borrin observes that apparently the United States is still at war. Who knew? In the past several days, fourteen Americans lost their lives in Afghanistan, while Iraq saw the worst bombing there in more than two years. What’s going on? Why isn’t this crazy shit over with? Will President Obama decide to keep our troops engaged in these wars, or expand the wars, or bring the troops home? Or will he magically make everyone get along and stop being assholes while interest-free credit flies out of his Presidential colon and green energy powers our spaceships to Planet Gay Marriage? Joining Borrin to consider at least part of that are one esteemed guest, and some other guy: General Stanley McChrystal and liberal columnist Robert Shrill. This program was recorded a the House of Honky Bean on October 27, 2009 at 7:30 or so in the pm PST.

Back after a month hiatus, we clearly missed some important events in the news: the Dow edged back up past 10000; President Obama won the Nobel Peace Prize as he weighs sending more troops to Afghanistan; the G-20 summit in Pittsburgh saw world leaders come together to denounce Iran’s nuclear ambitions and sort of consider curbing their own; big corporations like Pacific Gas & Electric, Exelon and Apple quit the US Chamber of Commerce over a difference of opinion on climate change; and health care reform has limped forward about two and a half inches from where it was when we last talked about it. And yet, out of all these major stories, nothing was really more important, more compelling, more indeed historic, than the amazing, heart-wrenching story that entered all of our lives late last week: the story of Balloon Boy. This is the first program to be recorded at the New House of Honky Bean (our first actual house!) at 7:30 or so in the pm PST.

To commemorate the 8th anniversary of the 9/11 attacks, Borrin speaks with former Vice President Dick Cheney about how he felt that day, what he thinks about President Obama, and how he plans to sell us all out to the alien overlords in 2012. NCR News will be on hiatus for a little while, due to a big move followed immediately by a vacation. It's complicated. But in the interim, you will be treated to some of the best NCR has to offer: all four NCR CDs, in order, in their entirety, in the weeks to come. Stay tuned ... This program was recorded live at the House of Honky Bean (last one in this apartment; next one will be in our actual house!) on Tuesday, September 15 at 7:30 or so in the pm PST.

In this episode, Borrin takes a look at the resignation of Van Jones, who served as President Obama’s White House Special Advisor for Green Jobs, Enterprise and Innovation until this last weekend. Mr. Jones found himself in the crosshairs of Glenn Beck, host of the aptly titled “The Glenn Beck Program,” and many believe Mr. Jones was forced to resign as a result of the controversy around him generated by this one talk show commentator. Does this mean Glenn Beck is powerful? Should the Obama administration have resisted caving into pressure from a right wing TV pundit? Where do I go to get balls like that? Joining Borrin to answer these and other pressing questions is the Ballmeister himself, Mr. Glenn Beck. Also joining them for no particularly good reason is NCR Very Senior News Analyst Daniel Snorr. Let the histrionics begin. This program was recorded live at The House of Honky Bean on September 8, 2009 at 7:30 or so in the pm.

In this episode, Borrin wonders if we're any closer as a nation to achieving the late Ted Kennedy's dream of universal health coverage. Joining Borrin to wonder about it is a true titan of American capitalism and a terrible human being, Scamron CEO Rich Whiteman. Also joining both of them later in the program is Zombie Senator Ted Kennedy, who now leads the Zombie Senate. Too soon? Yes. This program was recorded at the House of Honky Bean on September 1, 2009 at 7:30 ish in the pm PST.

In this episode, Borrin explores the vexing problem of identity theft. A massive identity theft scheme was uncovered by authorities in Florida this week, a scheme that involved more than 130 million credit card numbers. But despite the big bust, there isn't much reason to feel safer as a result. What should you do if someone is stealing your identity? Is it just annoying to encounter someone so unoriginal, or is it dangerous? Joining Borrin tonight to explore the topic is someone he believes is ripping him off: Warren Olney, host of NPR's "To The Point." It's a doppleganger duel! This program was recorded live at the House of Honky Bean on August 18, 2009 at 7:30 or so in the pm.

In this episode, Borrin takes a look at the ugly turn that the debate over health care has taken. Democrats decided to take the debate to their constituents with town hall meetings in the hope that they could build momentum from the public. But that effort seems to have backfired, as Republicans activists have taken the opportunity to loudly shout them down. Has the debate over health care turned into a debate over how we debate? Joining Borrin to talk over each other and fight it out are two important voices in the health care debate: Democratic Senator Harry Reid, of Nevada; and NCR Youth Correspondent Travis McCormack. This program was recorded at the House of Honky Bean on August 11, 2009 at 7:30 or in the pm PST.

No show this week ... just this song, which thanks you kindly for your patience. If you work in customer service, feel free to replace your hold music with this tune, gratis.

It's Sporty Guns, a program for men who love sports, guns, God, America, American guns and our American God, with your host, Russell Smithennnenenenenennen. This week, Russell has a very special guest on the show, and it might even be true that he’s not a queer: Vice President Joe Biden. The two of them talk politics, sports, and many subjects you should never expose your children to. They also fire off a bunch of weapons, as is the tradition on Sporty Guns. You'll see. This program was recorded live at the House of Honky Bean on July 28, 2009 at 7:30 or so in the pm.

In this program, you'll hear a special edition of Very Gross' Fluff Air with special guests, Vice President Dick Cheney and former Prime Minister Tony Blair. Tony and Dick take listener calls, and one of those lucky listeners scores Mr. Cheney's snappy plaid suit! Huzzah. This program was recorded live at KPFK 90.7 FM on July 23, 2007. Many many thanks to Christine Blosdale, Alan Minsky, Chris Burnett, Indymedia On Air and killradio.org. Yes, I thought we would be back this week with the latest headlines. Apparently not. But this one's good. Enjoy, and see you next time.

In this program, Borrin examines the life and legacy of Michael Jackson. The reclusive megastar had nearly moonwalked out of our lives until suddenly, unexpectedly, he died from cardiac arrest a couple weeks ago; and now, try as we might, we just can’t stop remembering him, or at least doing our best to only remember that guy from twenty years ago and not the guy who just died. But what was he really, really really like? Was he really a creepy pederast, or a tragically misunderstood genius, or both, or neither? Joining Borrin make this about as clear as mud is NCR Very Senior News Analyst and apparently, close friend of Michael Jackson, Daniel Snorr. This program was recorded live at the House of Honky Bean on July 7, 2009 PST.

May the King of Pop rest in peace -- his work here, in our dimension, is completed.

In this episode, Borrin takes a look at our Overachiever-In-Chief. President Barack Obama is pursuing ambitious policies right now on a variety of fronts. From peace in the Middle East to health care to an energy policy that will address the threat of global warming, there’s hardly an aspect of our lives that Obama doesn’t want to change. But will it be for the better? Joining Borrin to contemplate just what all this change means is the Changemesiter himself, President Barack Obama. He joins the program on the line from space. This program was recorded at the House of Honky Bean, and in space, on June 30, 2009 at about 7:30 pm PST.

In this episode, Borrin asks, what the fuck is happening in Iran? A disputed election result earlier this month has escalated from concern about the integrity of the vote to major street protests, internal rifts within Iran’s ruling coalition and for the first time in thirty years, talk of another revolution. Is there any real chance of that happening, or does that just sound cool to people sitting in their liberal ivory towers? Do you wish you had a liberal ivory tower to call your own? No? And what’s at stake for America in this internal Iranian conflict? Joining Borrin to talk about is Grand Ayatollah Ali “Al” Khomeini, who is visiting Los Angeles and just learned to speak English fluently this week. This program was recorded at the House of Honky Bean on June 23, 2009 at 7:30 or so in the pm PST.

In this enthralling episode, Borrin examines the Obama administration's foray into the morass of health care reform. President Obama said on the campaign trail that he intended to make health care a reality for every American citizen, especially the 45 million who do without it right now. Yesterday he addressed the American Medical Association, and Congress is already wrangling over new legislation to make health care for everyone a reality. Can he do it? Is the status quo really so bad? If you’re sick, isn’t that just because you turned your back on God? Joining us to opine uselessly about it are three guests of little distinction: Internet-educated Doctor Anton Le Yummy, shrill liberal columnist Robert Squeal, and a man in dire need of better health, NCR Very Senior News Analyst Daniel Snorr. This program was recorded with the brand new setup at the home of Honky Bean on June 16, 2009 at 7:30 or so pm PST.

It's Bookweasel, a highly literate show tailor made for anyone too sophisticated to enjoy pop culture. In this episode, host Alouicious Thornberry sits down with highly acclaimed actor, writer, director, photographer and poet, Leonard Nimoy, and shows him no deference whatsoever. Is it logical? Not so much, and neither is the man who is/is not Spock. This program was recorded at the isgoodradio on Stardate 0602009 at 7:30 pm PST or so.

In this episode, Borrin explores a thorny question: should Bush administration “enhanced interrogation techniques,” aka “torture,” be prosecuted? Does Obama have the stones to do it, or is that just looking backward and not forward? What’s wrong with crushing a prisoner’s soul if it’s in defense of freedom? Does that make no sense at all? And really: who asked you? Joining Borrin are three guests he did ask: Dr. Anton Le Yummy, a psychologist who oversaw some of these enhanced interrogations; former Attorney General Alberto Gonzales, who may or may not have authorized some of these practices but can’t recall if he can recall; and the Grand Wizard of Torture himself, the Overlord and former Vice President, Dick Cheney. ¡Feliz Cinco de Mayo! This program was recorded on May 5, 2009 at The isgoodradio Studio at about 7:30 pm PST.

In this episode, Borrin explores how the evil swine flu found its way to humans, other than through illegal immigrants. Joining him to share in the panic, racism and remarkable abundance of bestiality jokes are president of the Pork Producers' Alliance of America, Hammy Hamcock; and NCR Senior Science Correspondent Ira Frodo. It's sickening. This program was recorded at the new Echo Park home of isgoodradio on Tuesday, April 28, 2009 at 7:30-ish in the p.m.

In this episode, Borrin explores the topic of foundering faith in America. Is our nation becoming less religious? Why has God forsaken us, or did we reject God first? Does that make us cooler than God? How can we be cooler than something that doesn’t exist? Does God exist? Is this thing on? Joining Borrin to answer these technical as well as existential questions are no esteemed guests. Instead, he's joined by Internet-educated scientist and research fellow at the Poseur Foundation, Dr. Anton Le Yummy; evangelical leader and founder of Focus on the Family, Dr. James Godson; and NCR youth correspondent Travis McCormick. This show is so fucking ridiculous it actually made us break, which I thought about cutting but instead, I left it in. This program was recorded at isgoodradio on March 10, 2009 at 7:30 in the p.m. PST.

Want to tune in to our Inauguration parody, but just don’t have an hour to spare? As a bonus, we’ve included here the NCR version of Obama’s Inaugural Address, all by its lonesome, for your listening pleasure. Feel the hopeful change as you hear this inspiring and profoundly stupid speech. Thank you and God bless this funky country.

It’s a Special Inauguration Edition of All Things Condescended, with a juicy “What’s The Point?” inside! And it is a doozie. Hear a report from the raucous streets of D.C.; a “What’s The Point?” retrospective of Bush’s legacy, featuring Lawrence O’Rabia, Condi Rice, Daniel Snorr, Pamela Des Barres, Travis McCormick, Jar Jar Binks, Dick Cheney, Mara Rightwing and the 43rd President himself; the Inauguration ceremony, and our new President’s Inaugural Address; a sales pitch for Barack Obama commemorative crap; extensive coverage of President Obama’s prodigious Inaugural balls; and, surprises, of the supernatural kind. Wow.

A new era has begun. It’ll be a challenging one, particularly for satirists. But every step, half-step and misstep of the way, NCR will be there, misguiding you through the icy waters to come. Hang on tight!